I Kid You Not

We recently received, I kid you not, a wedding invitation on red velvet. I can chalk that up to a taste which is different from my own. However, what I cannot understand is having a reply card that is also made of red velvet and virtually impossible to fill out. I'm trying to decline and damn it if that stupid red velvet does not allow ink to print into it. I had to write over it repeatedly to get any ink on the darn thing. I think only wool would be a less practical material. Maybe I'll have to go get out my eyeliner pencil to make it more legible.