satisfied

inner peace
I've been feeling immensely satisfied with my life for the past few months. I've never been unsatisfied necessarily, but I often feel as though I'm searching for my inner peacefulness which is oh-so-close, yet oh-so-far. Lately it's feel as if perhaps I have found my inner peacefulness. Further proof, to me, that I'm closer to that area within myself is that I'm not thinking because I've said this aloud it'll all be yanked away. I could be, but I choose to believe it won't.

Thank goodness for the maturity and wisdom (hopefully) that comes with aging, the support and love of family and friends, the chemical balancing of anti-depressants, and for stability.

allowance
I don't think I ever blogged about this, but back in June we started a cashless allowance system with Avery. I went with cashless for two reasons: 1. the hassle of getting the right cash (namely enough ones) and 2. the movement of our society to a cashless one. This drove me to find a book about a cashless allowance system and then come up with a system for us. I think it's a good system, but it's a good system to implement when she's a bit older. The idea of money in an account is too abstract for her.

We also had a problem of her having too much spending money. Her allowance was $4.75 per week (her age). She would forget about her allowance, or we wouldn't be in stores selling items she wanted, for weeks at a time. Then we'd be out and she'd want to buy something and it seemed she always had money.

Given those two problems, I have switched her to a cash allowance and re-structured it to reduce spending money per week, if not the overall amount. I implemented the save, spend, donate categories that I know a lot of parents use to teach kids about money. I was resistant to telling her how to spend her money because I wanted her to make her own mistakes and learn from there. However, now that I've seen her reactions to having spending money, I realize that she needs the structure initially before being allowed to stray from the structure to learn her own lessons. She now gets $5 per week (a raise you say!), but $2 goes to spending, $2 goes to saving, and $1 goes to donate.

I also adjusted it such that she has to identify what she wants to save up for and stick to that. For example, right now she wants a Doc McStuffins doll that costs $40. I don't want her to get distracted from that goal when she sees some cheap stuff in the checkout line. I want her to feel the process of saving for something, sticking to that, then getting it.

In addition to tangible money, I created some worksheets so she can visually see how much more she has to earn to get whatever her goal is. Those are the green sheets in the picture above.

The goal of having her know how much more she has to save to get her goal item is on-track. Tonight she sat down and counted (correctly) the empty boxes that still need 1's in them to reach her goal.

I just need to get a bunch of one dollar bills and stash them away somewhere so I always have her allowance money ready.

unnecessary gadget I inexplicably want
Deluxe eBook and iPad Holder.

snappy

ScanSnap s510m
When no one responded to my query about how long one should have to pine for a toy before caving to comsumeristic instincts, I took that to mean that I was fated to buy my toy. I considered buying it new because I can always convince myself I need the latest and greatest technology. However, since the one I could get off of Craigs' List cost me over 50% less, I went with that option.

My new toy, which I've wanted for years, is a scanner. But not just any scanner. A Fujitsu ScanSnap!  Mine is an older version of the one I linked to. I'm absolutely thrilled with it so far.  I've wanted to go paperless for years, but unless I had a fast scanner, that was not going to happen. I have just breezed through a massive pile of papers. This stuff makes me giddy!

And it's so freakin' easy that I'll be able to quickly scan documents that come in. Paperless will happen!

D's response: [inner eye roll I couldn't see, but knew was there] "how much did it cost" [I answer] "that's not too bad. whatever makes you happy." And that, folks, is the way to make a spouse happy.

Kung Fu
I somehow managed to completely forget about kung fu class and, for some reason, they weren't on the calendar. Today, as we left soccer, Avery asked when she got to go to kung fu again. It hit me that her class started in 45 minutes. So, after a quick stop at the grocery store, we zipped over and she had a great time.

Other minutia

• I cooked dinner for the second night since being back from Mexico. That must be some sort of record for me. 
• I have no desire for more minutia because I am happily scanning away. Wheeee!

art

Pumpkin Patch
Yesterday we (Mom, D and I) went to the pumpkin patch with Avery. It was a bit early for such an activity, but it was a company event with D's office, so off we went. She had a good time going down the slides and running all over. She also got her face painted for the first time.

A side benefit to have a child's face painted: when she starts to cry (later in the day) which in turns makes the paint run, she will stop crying almost immediately upon realizing this. Woohoo.

I've got to say, I'm not a big fan of pumpkin patches. I just don't get them. But, Avery seems to like them quite a bit so there you go.

iPhone debacle
Following the pumpkin patch, we went to the store to have Mom's phone switched for D's old iPhone. Well, that turned out not to work too well. Long story short, when they repaired the water damage, the speakers still worked. However, some connections were lost and the end result is that while you can make and receive calls, the ringer won't actually ring when a call is coming in. So unless you're just sitting there staring at the screen, you won't know a call is coming in.

Today I'll take Mom's phones back to the store, have the sim cards switched back. Then, when D's iPhone 5 arrives, we'll give Mom my old iPhone (which is the one D is using now since he broke his phone). Whew.

G date night = art buying for us
Odd as it sounds, D and I ended up buying three oil paintings from a woman going door-to-door selling art work done by Israeli art students last night. I said no at first, but this girl was a GOOD saleswoman. Anyway, we ended up with paintings for my office, the dining room, and our bedroom. I have to get them stretched to hang still, but I have appointment for that on Friday. Of course, she could have been selling oil painting done by whomever, but it doesn't really matter who actually did the work since the point is we like the art work. I lean strongly towards believing her, but it's always questionable when you buy things that way. So I guess the art of door-to-door sales is not dead.

The whole experience reminded me of what D and I refer to as our "sucker rug" which we bought on our honeymoon. We were in Istanbul touring the Blue Mosque. There was a young guy (early 20's) who approached us about a rug before we went into the mosque. We resisted, but then he met us on the other side when we came out. D and I are both prone to be impressed by good salesmen who have perfected their art. We ended up visiting the rug store he was employed by and yes, we ended up walking out with a Turkish rug.

The thing is, while I always feel like a sucker when we do these things, I rarely regret it. I love that we have that rug to remember our honeymoon. Loreto Bay was another example of a great sales process that sucked us in (though we were pretty much going to buy a casa without such a great sales process) and I don't regret that at all. So I hope these paintings produce fond memories as well.

I'll post pictures when they're hung (if I ever get around to taking pictures).

Mom's BD
Mom's BD is this Saturday. Since none of the activities are a surprise for her, I'll share our plans. I'll pick Mom up on Saturday afternoon. We'll hit a movie of her choice downtown, then kill some time shopping/walking around before dinner. Dinner will be out Southpark since Mom requested fish. Following that, we'll be hitting Barefoot Sage for a foot and leg massage. I hadn't heard of Barefoot Sage before RHG mentioned she and Jay were going there after Jay's BD dinner. I decided it would be perfect for Mom's BD, too. Jay and RHG's reviews of it were excellent, so I'm very much looking forward to that.

There is a Timbers game that night, so D will be going to that. The Gs will, of course, be sitting Avery. Thank you as always Gs.

Vegas 2012

Vegas
We had a great time on our annual trip to Vegas with our friends, Vic and Mike. It was their first weekend away from Bear, who will turn 1 this coming weekend. Mike's dad did call them at 5 am one morning to tell them everything was going great, but other than that, it seemed like a much needed break for them. These weekends away are, for me, no longer about getting away from parenthood as much as they are about reconnecting with good friends and enjoying good food. We ate at several great restaurants: Joël Robuchon, Lotus of Siam, RM Seafood (Rick Moonen's restaurant) . I highly recommend all three restaurants should you find yourself in Vegas hungry and unsure where to go to satisfy this hunger.

Vic and D played poker. I read (Gang Leader for a Day). I toured the shark reef in Mandalay Bay. I played Scramble with Friends and Hanging with Friends obsessively, as I have been for the past month or two - sigh - such a time sucker. I ate a lot of frozen yogurt.

Avery, meanwhile, had a wonderful long weekend with Nain. They went to the zoo, went swimming, went shopping, went to the library, and I'm sure other things I'm forgetting. Each call we got Avery was very happy and didn't seem to miss us at all, yet she was thrilled when we got home. I love coming home to Avery. It was awesome when Mom left last night (she picked us up at the airport). I hugged Mom and Avery saw. Then she yells to D that he should hug Nain. He does so. Then she says we need a group hug! I should note she's commanding all these things from her throne, well, THE throne. After she finished and washed her hands, she came out and we had a big group hug. Avery loves a good group hug.

Chair
Good news! Ethan Allen agreed to make us the chair for our sectional that they've stopped selling. This is by far the easiest and cheapest solution to our first world dilemma.

First Day
And now it's time to pick Avery up from her first day of pre-k! I did take the obligatory first day picture, but I haven't downloaded it to the computer yet. In due time, people.

Summary

• Avery is taking a nap right now. Because she asked for one. She decided to curl up on the couch to do it. Last time she did this, she woke up with a fever. I think this time she was just bored, so a napped seemed as good a thing to do as anything else. 
• I'm making Mom some change of address cards right now. I do love anytime I can use my Silhouette. 
• I made a couple of towel bibs using just my serger. The first one I made was too fussy because it required buttons. The next one was a much better design, but alignment was wrong. The third one I made is better, but the tension was set wrong on my serger, so I'm worried the threads will snag and make the whole thing fall apart. Hopefully the fourth time is a charm. Yes, I could have made the towel bibs using just my sewing machine, but it's much faster to use the serger. Plus, I'm looking for / developing easy project to do so I can get familiar with my serger. 
• We leave for Vegas on Friday - woohoo! Avery will be staying with my mom since the Gs are in Hawaii. 
• I had a hair appointment scheduled for today at 12:15. I made the appointment online about a week ago, making sure it was next to another appointment I had to maximize time, then arranged for Avery to be at Nain's house. I got a call from the salon at 11:30 saying there was a "scheduling conflict" and that "no one would be there during that time." The girl on the VM was about as competent (or incompetent) as you'd expect a millennial who works at a hair salon making appointments to be. She didn't apologize. She just said they could have me come in tonight or tomorrow. I called back and said that I'd arranged my whole day around this appointment (true) and that no, I would not be rescheduling. Then I booked my highlighting and cut at a salon in Vegas. I simply can't abide spending my money at an establishment that treats customers with such disregard - I don't care if he does know how to cut hair really well! So now I'll have to find a new place in Portland.
• We moved our couch back a bit (closer to the kitchen) because we discovered we could hear the sound better from the overhead speakers. As a result, we have a weird gap of space between the end of the couch (the part under the window that faces the front of the house) and the entertainment center. We could put a table there, but it will just gather dust. There is absolutely no need, ever, for a table there. So the only thing to do is to buy an armless single seater to add to the sectional. We called Ethan Allen and they just discontinued our sectional. They increased the width or depth or something by 1", so the overall look is still sold, but the exact specifications are not available. This leaves three options if we want a chair there: 1. Get Ethan Allen corporate to agree to make us the one-off chair since it was so recently discontinued (this is the preferable and cheapest route). 2. Buy just the chair from the floor model, recover it in our fabric, refinish the wood on the bottom to match our current sectional (this option is the most expensive and is out in my mind). 3. Sell our sectional back to Ethan Allen at a discounted price & buy the new sectional with the additional chair (doable).
• We had to buy a new washing machine last week. While I know that it's probably the modern appliance I couldn't live without (imagine washing clothes by hand!), it's just a boring new item to have to buy. I'd so much rather buy fun gadgets with that money (who wouldn't?) I have yet to test out the new washer since I managed to get most loads done before the other one went completely kaput.  

Barge

Launch
We went to a barge launch this morning. Not normally an activity we'd go to, but we got an invitation and figured why not? So we went and I'm glad we did. It was a short ceremony before the launch, bag pipes played, then put that barge in the water after christening it. It's pretty cool to watch something that big hit the water so quickly, and for the first time.

Cycle (free, share, and bi)
After the barge launch and another errand (picking up a donated sewing machine I got off of Freecycle for Sharecycle), we decided to go bicycle shopping for Avery. The first store, a real bike store, had one for $180. A tad pricey for a bike she won't use that much. The next store, Target, had only two choices for her size: Disney princesses or Barbie brands. Nope. So then we went to a used bike shop on Alberta St. They didn't have any bikes in her size. When we got home, I got on craigslist and found her to be what looks like a nice one for $50. Much more reasonable. There are bikes on there for less than that, but this one meets D's criteria of it not being completely pink and girly and frilly, yet Avery will like it.

Spoiled
After reading this article, Why Are American Kids Spoiled, I got all fired up this morning. It contains nothing I find shocking or new necessarily, but it made me realize that I need to have higher expectations for what Avery is capable of doing.

Anyway, I read the article before getting ready for our outing. I called Avery and told her she was going to go upstairs, get dressed completely dressed with shoes and I wasn't going to say it again. She marched upstairs and got dressed. Then I told her to tidy up her room and that I wasn't going to tell her how since she knew what to do. She did that. There was no whining and no nagging. That last part is probably a coincidence and I don't expect it to be so easy next time, but I'm going to do my damnedest to stop doing things for her when she's capable of doing them herself.

Tin Shed
While over on Alberta for bicycle shopping, we stopped for lunch at Tin Shed. It was so worth the wait. I had the Dr. Dreay - a sandwich with Canadian bacon, two eggs over medium, with jam on bread (I subbed gluten free for sourdough, of course). With a side of cheesy grits. DE-licious.

Date Night & Movies
Tonight is date night. We're going to watch the first half of the Timbers game at The Thirsty Lion, which is the official viewing party location for this game. Then we'll see the French movie The Intouchables. It only has a 77% critics' rating (which isn't bad, but not amazing), but more importantly the user score is 91%. In our experience, a foreign and/or indie flick with a fairly good critic rating and a much better audience rating tends to be right up our alley. Mom will be joining us since this is a movie she'll probably like.

Last night D and I rented Battle Royale through Amazon Instant Videos. This is the original idea for The Hunger Games. I'm not sure how Suzanne Collins didn't get sued by the guy/gal who wrote Battle Royale (it was a book before a movie). Maybe you can't sue if someone uses their own words but steals your idea? Anyway, this movie was MUCH more violent than The Hunger Games and it was very Japanese in its style of acting and directing, but it did hold my attention.

AirPlay

Weekend update and other random thoughts

We have our date night tonight. Despite the fact that I'm sick and slept in until 11 this morning as a result, I'm still going on date night. The three of us (Mom, D & I) are going to see Undefeated, a documentary about inner-city football. I'm sure it has much more depth than that description, but I don't know like to know too much about movies before I see them. 

Last night's babysitting with Avery, Elise, Nolan and Henry went very well. Mom helped me get dinner onto the plates and get that cleaned up, as well as helped with various other things, so that was very helpful. Fortunately the kids fell into line fairly easily. Once I had them all in bed there was minimal getting up. Henry let a few minor protests fly, but they were nothing out of the ordinary for a 4yo boy. Avery was the last to get to sleep, but this is typical on date nights. Plus, because we have the routine that she can play in her room as long as she wants, as long as she stays in her room, that tends to make her bedtime later on nights when we have E & N (and/or Henry) over. 

It hit me the other day that I basically treat A's sleep like I do food. I provide her the opportunity and atmosphere to get plenty of regular, good sleep; however, whether she takes advantage of that is up to her. That's what we've done with food. We give her a variety of healthy foods (plus some non-healthy ones), then let her eat what she will.  Occasionally we make comments on her eating more x or y and on her getting to sleep earlier or being quiet, but for the most part we leave it up to her. So far this has worked well for us. It is, however, one of those things that I know probably wouldn't work if we had two kids. The odds of getting two kids with temperaments to not (regularly) fight sleep or that don't (regularly) fight healthy (or is healthful?) foods are slim. 

I find I think about what kind of parent I'd be with > 1 kid often. I think it's for two reasons: 

1. I'm grateful I realized that I am (speculatively) a better parent to one kid than I would be to > 1 kid. That's not to say I'd be terrible with > 1 kid, but I think my natural strike zone is = 1. 

2. I fairly regularly watch 2 kids, plus Avery. We have had to implement rules in the house simply to accomodate when the G kids come over. They're really good kids, but once you're at more than 1, things get really messy, really fast. 

Airplay

One great thing about our new receiver (bought for the new surround sound system* in the living room) is that is has AirPlay compatibility. We didn't seek out this function. It's just a happy coincidence that the receiver picked out for us by our installer had it. It means we can wirelessly stream music from any computer or iPhone or iPod on our network to the stereo system in the living room. And it's easy to do. 

Case in point: this morning Elise and Avery went downstairs to play. D and I were still in bed. Avery came in to tell D that she and Elise were going to have a celebration in the living room, but they needed music and she couldn't get daddy's numbers to work. D unlocked his phone for her and she and Elise scooted back downstairs to play while D and I drifted quickly back to sleep. About a minute later we hear blasting music coming from the living room. And this is to show that 4yo can easily figure out how to use the AirPlay functionality, but have not yet mastered turning the volume down. 

*We didn't know anything about what we wanted in surround sound since our entire goal was to better hear the dialoge on TV shows, not to experience car chances and action scenes with true surround sound. 

Headache

Same old story
This post should be about our fabulous new living room furniture. Instead it's more about the fact that I feel like total shit. This headache - and the ever-present nausea that accompanies most of my headaches - has been going on since just after I ate lunch. At 2 am, it's not worse than it was all day. I have an appointment with a doctor tomorrow morning.

OK, so there's not much to say about a headache. It hurts and it sucks. I shall move on.

Fabulous furniture 
Our furniture arrived yesterday! I'm pleased to report that I'm completely thrilled with it.  The configuration makes the room feel much bigger. Because of the configuration, the couch can also be moved back (further away from the TV) which also creates more space. My favorite thing, though, is that the couch is extremely comfortable for me. Rather, it will be once the TV is moved above the fireplace. D is not as pleased since he doesn't find the couch as comfortable as our previous couch. I told him to try out my position on the couch when I went up to bed early (see aforementioned headache), so we might have some negotiations coming up regarding our assigned seats for TV watching.

I'm so excited for the built-in cabinetry!

Theater class
I signed Avery up for a theater class that started a few weeks ago. As she watched Pinkalicious and The Nutcracker, she often asked about when she got to go on stage. I figured I'd let her try a theater class to see how she liked it. Based on my observations, she loves, loves, loves it. She runs into class without looking back at me or saying goodbye. Each time I've glanced in the room, she's grinning from ear to ear. Tonight, after we got home, she was putting on performances for no one using the new ottoman as her stage.

3 AM
It's 3 am now. Headache and nausea no better. This sucks.

Calendar

Same old stuff
Ah crap. I'm sitting here trying to think of a fun little element to add to my blog. Like a fun fact of the day ... but then I have to look up facts everyday. Or a few new fact about me ... but then I'm going to drive away friends with my weirdness day by day until I have no friends left whatsoever. Then what will I do on January 5th with no friends? Ha! I crack myself up with my self-deprecating humor.

Back to the old standby. Random, random and more random.

Calendar
What have I spent the bulk of my day doing? Scheduling stuff on the calendar for the new year, including getting things organized and synced between RHG and me. The functional side of the relationship between RHG and me requires calendar organization every few months. It's tedious, but worth it. Each new quarter, new session of classes, new stage in our children's lives, etc requires we juggle things a bit.

It doesn't help that I'm easily distractible when on the computer, so I end up taking care of other tasks while attempting to complete the calendar task. For example, I've also resolved some Pay Pal account issues, ordered a BD gift for Avery's brother, cleaned out some of my emails, etc.

Presents
D got me the new Silhouette cameo for Christmas! Woohoo! I can't wait to start playing with it, but I'm trying to be disciplined enough to take care of all outstanding catch-up tasks before breaking it out of the box.

For my BD he bought me the 4s iPhone. I wanted to try out Siri whilst driving this morning (to test the ease of texting a quick message while en route), but my Bluetooth isn't pairing with the new phone. So there's another thing to figure out.

Lose It!
Vic, Damian and I decided to log our food until our Mexico trip in May. The penalty for not logging by midnight of each day is that we put $1 into the other person's account, to be paid up at the end. The goal is just to make sure we're logging our food versus trying to hit a number since just the act of logging what you eat makes an impact.

We're logging in loseit.com this time (instead of fitday as we've done previously) because their app for the iPhone is better. If anyone would like to join me in this challenge, just create a free account on loseit.com and friend me at my gmail address. We can keep each other accountable ($1 penalty optional). Dad? Anyone?

Fire

Kindle Fire
I pre-ordered the Kindle Fire a month or so ago. The selling point for me was its support of Flash. That iPads do not support Flash is a main driver in my decision not to get an iPad. If I'm not going to be able to view a large percentage of websites on a tablet, it really doesn't meet my needs (who am I kidding? My wants.) The other significant factor was size. The iPad is just a bit too big for my preferences. So I bought the Kindle Fire.

So far, I like it well enough. It does what I want it to do - play movies and tv, surf the web, and allow me to read books on it. I'm extremely annoyed with the "homepage." About ⅔ of the screen is taken up with the recently viewed items. There is no way to hide or opt not to see this. As a result, I feel like I have all this clutter that I need to take care of. That is my biggest complaint.

My next biggest complaint is the same one I have for iPads. How is it that none of these tablets (that I know of) have a button on the keyboard that will just insert your email address when you press it?  These things are used to log into sites galore and having to type my email address over and over and over again is ridiculous. It would be so easy to have a button to do this. Why do they not have it?!

Reading on it is much like reading on the iPad. You use your finger to swipe to the next page, can adjust the background color (I read with a cream colored background and the brightness turn all the way down). Most of the time I will still opt to read on my regular Kindle, but this is handy for night reading.

I used it yesterday to stream reruns of Cheers episodes while I assembled Avery's BD invitations.  It was good background noise for that activity. And it preferable to having the TV on (no commercials, not as loud, etc). I also watched a few episodes of Arrested Development since D was out of the evening. That show is hilarious.

Invitations
I finished up all the invitations yesterday. I'm fairly pleased with how they came out, especially considering I had no real plan going into making them, nor did I buy any of the supplies specifically for the invitation. I merely used what I had available.  I'm also pleased that I got to use my Silhouette extensively.

I blacked out the details in the scanned invitation shown below. I used maybe six or seven different patterns for the invitation background. I also did some with purple leotards and pink tutus.

Prime

Amazon finally did it
I've had Amazon Prime for a year now from a promotional program in which I participated. I've been wavering about renewing Prime. They've had various benefits of Prime membership that have come close to swaying me, but I was still on the edge until tonight. I just signed up for Prime after seeing the Kindle Owners' Lending Library where I can borrow books for free from Amazon. We buy a lot of books for our Kindles, so I think we'll save a chunk from that. We'll also save it on shipping.  It's still a luxury, but it's a luxury I know I'll appreciate.

Guy Fawkes Night
We're hosting our annual Guy Fawkes Night for D's colleagues at our house tomorrow night. I made a poster for the occasion. It didn't turn out quite as fabulous as it was planned to be in my head, but hey, it's another use for my Silhouette.

I made the mask using the trace tool, then cut it out in vinyl.  I bought the images for Big Ben and the Tower Bridge. I also bought the fireworks images. I cut them out and then applied glitter to make them more realistic. And I downloaded (for free) an old English font. D's company's name is in the upper right corner, but I airbrushed that out of the picture.  

Famous
RHG called me the other night and said she didn't know we were famous. I said, "huh?" A friend of hers was reading the most recent issue of NW Kids Magazine and recognized our picture. A few weeks ago, the magazine interviewed our adoption agency for a story on open adoption. Our agency gave them our picture. They emailed us and asked us if they could use it.  I said sure and figured it would be a little picture off to the side. Turns out that it's THE picture of the story. If you want to read the story, click on the link to the magazine above, then click on the picture under the "Current Issue" link on the right side. The story on open adoption is on pages 20 & 21. There's also a glimpse of Avery in the table of contents.

Pottery

9 years = pottery

Yesterday was our ninth wedding anniversary.  Nine years.  Very cool.  We're almost into double digits and numbers I don't know in foreign languages.  Even cooler.   

We always give each other something from the traditional anniversary gift list.  Nine years is pottery/ceramics.  We both waited until yesterday to go shopping for gifts.  Around 11:30, I went into a store near D's office to look for pottery, The Real Mother Goose.  I'm not even sure where else one would go in Portland to get pottery because I'm far from a pottery seeker.  After browsing aimlessly for about 20 minutes, the clerk asks me if she can help me.  I said, "Well, it's my ninth wedding anniversary and that is pottery and well, my husband and I aren't pottery people."  She then says, "That's funny.  There was a man in her earlier today who said that same thing."  Immediately I knew it had to be D.  Fast forward to our gift exchange later in the day and sure enough, it was D.  We missed each other by probably 15 minutes or so.  Anyway, I got him a bowl and he got me a chicken and a piece of art. But, then he got me another gift that was delivered today: a new iMac!  Woohoo!  Now that's how to celebrate nine years.  So, in terms of presents, D wins the 9 year wedding anniversary battle. Of course, when he wins, I win. 

Weekend away

In other news, D and I are heading away for the weekend for his company's retreat.  Originally we were just going to be gone on Saturday night.  However, after Amber offered to take Avery on Friday night, too, we realized we could stay Friday night up there, too.  This is important because it gives me the opportunity to sleep in before my oh-so-difficult afternoon of spa-ing.
In the evening we have a party where the dress code is hipsters.  I'm wearing a purple 80's style prom dress, a green cummerbund, green and black striped tights, a purple vest/shrug, and blue rimmed Ray-Ban knock off glasses topped off with black hiking boots.   

On Sunday, there's apparently a very popular brunch at the lodge where we're staying (Skamania), so I'm looking forward to that, too! 

Meanwhile, Avery is talking non-stop of her coming sleep over with Josie.  And she's talking a lot about Cayden.  I think she might have some sort of platonic crush on Cayden.  We hardly ever see Cayden, yet when I have gum, Avery will ask me, "Can Cayden have gum?" She does the same thing at other random times.  She wants to know what jammies Cayden will be wearing and whether they'll be scary.  The mind of a 3yo fascinates me. 

High

High self-esteem day

Friday was a day to strengthen my self-esteem with a number of events (written on Friday):

• D just asked me how to do something obscure in Excel and I was able to recall from my many years of Excel devotion from way back when exactly what it was called.  Minor, but nice. 
• When I had my friend & neighbor's daughter this afternoon, she had three minor fits at the grocery store.  With each I calmly stood my ground.  During the third one, she actually got down in the middle of the produce section and started crying.  I continued to stand my ground and was able to calmly bring an end to the fit without giving in one little bit.  I had about ten people watching me as this fit went down.  A  woman (60-ish) came up to me after it was over and commented how well I handled it.  Excellent. 
• I got a number of things done today and this makes me feel good. 
• Finally, Avery is starting to understand the new reward system I started a couple of weeks ago.  I wanted to give her an incentive to do things like tidy her room and set the table without me asking her to do them.  So I decided to tell her she could earn two tickets if she did a task without me asking her to do it and one ticket when she does it when I ask her to.  She has, predictably, said no to performing a task I ask her to do.  To get around this, I tell her that the choice is do the task and earn a ticket, or I still make her do the task, but she earns no ticket.  It only took one time of her having to do the task and getting no ticket for her to realize she should take the one ticket deal.  Anyway, I thought it wasn't getting through to her that doing tasks without being asked would rewarded.  However, in the past couple of days, she's taken the initiative to do a few tasks. 

Sushi & Gelato

D and I took Avery and the G kids out for sushi and gelato tonight.  Considering we were out to eat with a 4, 3, and 2 yo, it went very well.  Best part was by the time we got home it was immediately time for bed!

Beach Trip

Elise earned a reward of going on a beach trip with a friend.  She chose to take Avery.  As long as G3 stays put, Avery will be off to the beach with Elise and Jay tomorrow for the bulk of the day.  In the evening is our date night.  Nice.

Update on Sunday: Avery had a great time with Elise and Jay at the beach.  And given the time, the Gs just kept Avery straight through date night, which meant that D and I had from 11:30 - the night free!

Estate Sale

On the way home from soccer today, Avery and I happened upon an estate sale.  So we popped in and I ended up buying a telephone chair/table, you know, because there's nothing like buying furniture for antiquated technologies.  Next up: fax table!

I plan to eventually (ha! in Megan-terms, that's like 4 years) refinish the wood so it's a darker colored wood, as well as reupholster it.  I just like it because it's unique.  Since I moved the chair that was in my office into the living room, I've been wanting a replacement.  I was just going to buy a cheap IKEA chair, but saw this and figured what the hell.  Plus, it's got a little nook below the table where I'm quite sure Avery will have a ton of fun putting things.

TV

I have been on a Seinfeld rerun kick.  I have no idea why.  I'm loving it, though.  Between Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm, I'm cracking up all day.

Oh, and if you're not watching Suits, you should be.

Hipsters

D and I spent our aforementioned free time on Saturday while Avery was at the beach shopping for our costumes for Partiamo, which is the name of the annual company retreat with D's office.  The theme this year is hipsters. Time will tell if I have the guts to wear my hipster costume.  I am not one to dress to standout and my outfit is quite loud.

Frame

Playdate

I am watching the kids now, which means I'm listening to them argue in Avery's room while I look at things on the computer.  Avery's favorite phrase of the moment ("You're not my best friend anymore!") has already been muttered, so the afternoon is off to a swinging start.

Impending Crash

I'm really happy and up right now.  Normally one would think this to be a good thing.  However, it makes D dread what he believes will be an upcoming crash.  I can't deny that this is usually the pattern, but when I'm in my up state like I am, I just can't imagine how I haven't gotten this depression thing licked.  I think, "I'll just be like this all the time.  It's so easy.  You just decide to be happy and you are! I'm so glad I've got it figured out now."  Then, at some point, poof.  It's gone.  At D's request, I scheduled an appointment to talk to my therapist/PMHNP while I'm in an up state to see what I can do about maybe leveling things out.  It feels ridiculous to think about talking about being too happy.  It's not like I'm manic or anything.  If I were like this all the time it would be a perfectly acceptable state.  It's just that I never remain at this state of happiness/elation/? for too long.  Of course, neither can I remember how long I do stay at this state since I don't notice it coming on nor do I notice it slipping away.

I was driving along thinking about all this today.  Among my thoughts is the usual, "Do I really want to blog about this?"  After all, people are loathe to discuss mental health issues and talk about this shit.  Admitting it's there and putting it up for the world (or all 4 of my readers) to read is reducing privacy.  But I always land at the same place: pretending this isn't something I have to deal with makes it so much harder.  And I'm not ashamed.  I'm annoyed and frustrated and pissed that my moods aren't as even as it appears other people's are, but I'd be more annoyed if I tried to hide my what? flaws? imperfections? depressions?  Whatever.

For now, I'm quite up, so it's all easy to manage.  Maybe I DO finally have it all figured out. Ha! I crack myself up.

Digital Frame

When I went to Mexico with my girlfriends, I left presents for Avery and D for each day that I was gone.  One of D's gifts was a digital photo frame.  I figured he could take it to his office and set it up there.  He never did, so it sat around in the box until I finally decided to load it up with pictures and put it in our house the other day.  It was then that I discovered digital photo frames are made for people like me.  In fact, I like it so much that I've ordered another one so we have one placed for landscape-oriented photos and the other for portrait-oriented photos.

Reasons I love the photo frame:

• The threshold for determining picture quality is lower.  If it's a snap shot that isn't a great photo, but that has special memories for me, I can load it up without a second thought. 
• The circle of subjects in the pictures widens.  I can't see myself ever putting pictures of the Gs or of our friends Vic and Mike on our walls.  Let's face it, if you don't even put up pictures of your family, you're not going to put them up of your friends. Also, it's a little weird to put up other people's family.  Yet, I love looking at pictures of Elise and Nolan and of us on vacation with Vic and Mike.  So I loaded all those up on the frame, too. 
• It's easy.  I realize that framing a photo and hanging it is easy for the vast majority of people.  For me, it is not.  It takes me over a year to hang pictures, if I ever get around to it.  Same for printing pictures / having pictures printed.  By the time I get the freakin' picture up, it's already two years out of date.  
• Variety.  Even once I have a picture up, I get bored of it very quickly.  I love the picture of D, Avery and me that we had framed, but now I pass by it so often that I'm bored of it.  
• Less clutter.  One frame = endless pictures.  Awesome.  

Chart Maker

After I made the chart for RHG & Elise, a couple of RHG's mommy friends saw it.  I had two requests to make them charts, too.  So I happily obliged putting my Silhouette to work and made them both charts and tokens.  In this process I discovered that I prefer to use the Silhouette to cut regular paper vs cutting cardstock.  I naturally gravitated towards cardstock since it makes the most sense.  However, if you're making letters to put on something, or you're cutting tokens that will be laminated, you don't need to the paper to be thick.  This means I finally found a use for all the scrapbook paper that I am oh-so drawn towards but never before had a use for.

Speaking of the Silhouette, I noticed the other day that there's a new version that cuts 12" paper (mine cuts 8").  I, of course, want it.  I will not buy it since I really, really can't justify that, but damn it! I want it.  Just like I want a letterpress after playing with one at Paper Source the other day.  Why must I love these tools and supplies so when I don't actually love the resulting products one makes with them? 

Funk

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Funky funkity funk

My lack of blogging is the usual: a sort of funk.  I spent all day on Thursday - and I mean ALL DAY - laying in bed staring at the ceiling or sleeping or watching TV.  All day.  What a waste.  Meanwhile, the house was filthy and I hadn't caught up on laundry since returning from Seattle.  I actually resorted to using a black Sharpie to fix some bleach stains on a pair black pants so I had some clean pants to wear.  At least the pants were clean.  And the Sharpie actually did quite a good job, so this really isn't the sob story it started out to be.

Yesterday, I had a much better day.  I took Avery to school earlier than usual simply because we were both ready. When I got home, I got laundry going, then took the dogs out for a walk.  Eddie just made it around the block before his back paw started dragging, so I then dropped him off at home, then took Turtle out for a big walk.  This morning, it's Turtle's paw that is bleeding.  She isn't limping and won't let me look at the paw.  Sigh. Another potential trip to the vet. 

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The Eddie Situation

Speaking of trips to the vet, Eddie's visit yielded an answer as to what we should do about Eddie, but the answer still leaves us in limbo.  The short answer is the vet said now is an appropriate time to put Eddie to sleep.  He's in constant discomfort.  However, he's not in excessive pain.  Pain, yes.  Excessive pain, probably not.  So, we can choose to wait until he reaches the point where he is in excessive pain or when he can no longer go up and down the stairs, etc.  Or we can do it before he reaches that point.  He's got weeks to 3 (ish) months before we hit the excessive pain point, the vet thinks.  I'm ready to put him to sleep; D is not there quite yet.  That I'm ready is partly because I'm just ready to be done picking up poop in the house everyday, and I'm ready to have one less being looking to me to care for him all the time.  This part of me feels immense guilt for these feelings. The not guilty part of me is ready because I don't want to see him get to excessive pain, nor do I think his quality of life is very good right now.  He can't go on daily walks.  He can only go a short distance before we come back.  He spends most of his day moving from room to room, following me, trying to get in a comfortable position.  He pants and pants and pants, which can't be restful.  Since the latter two behaviors are really annoying, both D and I often snap at him.  He's also sleeping in the garage, rather than in the house with Turtle and us; however, I don't actually think he minds that at all, so I can't really list that as a bad quality of life.

Anyway, the vet did give us some more medication for him, but not for pain.  This is an antidepressant for people that he says sometimes helps dogs with anxiety (excessive panting, following from room to room).  It's definitely working on the panting.  He still follows me around, but perhaps it's not quite as bad as it was - I'm not sure on that one.  Either way, I'm less annoyed, so I feel better able to handle the time between now and when D reaches the point where he's also ready.  After discussing it this afternoon, D has decided he'd like to wait until the end of summer so Eddie can enjoy being out on the deck and enjoy the summer.  This assumes, of course, that the pain doesn't ramp up.  Right now, I think he'll be able to handle it since he's taking his pain medication more regularly.

D talked to Avery the other night about the fact that Eddie's going to die.  Avery understands he'll die and he'll be gone, but she says it's for a "long, long, long time."  Then she says, "but that's OK, because we have Turtle Girlie!"  She doesn't seem to show any true sadness about it yet.  I think she does somewhat get death because, since that conversation took place, she'll say things like, "I don't want you ever to die, Mommy," or, "I won't let you die, Mommy."  Yesterday, she said something about not wanting Daddy to die.  I keep assuring her we're not going to die for a very long time. As with most of these topics when they're merely speculation, I'm very far removed from emotion with them.  I don't cry about Eddie unless I'm actually thinking through the process of putting him to sleep and what that means.  I did end up bawling in the vet's office, but I think that's to be expected.  

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Motorcycle

D bought his motorcycle today.  It turned into an all day affair.  He ended up going with a Kawasaki Ninja after reading that it was a good bike for new riders. It's apple green, so I approve of the color.

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Date Nights

The G kids just left.  Tomorrow will be our date night since we Friday night was my book club meeting.  There are many movies I want to see.  This could be a difficult decision.

Smell

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"Can I smell your breath?"

D and I were talking about another of Avery's quirks last night.  I don't recall documenting it on my blog, so that would be what this is.  Avery, for the last 3-6 months (time eludes me) has been asking to smell our breath.  Or she'll ask us to smell her breath.  It's usually to see what we've been eating.  She'll know that I just ate some chocolate and ask to smell my breath.  Making it more odd is that she needs to have you blow your breath right into her nose, so she's really, really close. 

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Movies

We saw Source Code and Win Win last night.  Win Win was definitely the better quality movie, but I also liked Source Code as an action adventure sort of movie. I'd recommend Win Win to almost anyone - it's funny, touching, and entertaining. As for Source Code, I think it's a good movie for folks who see a lot of movies and who enjoy action flicks.  You have to really suspend reality and be willing to overlook a few illogical plot points to enjoy Source Code.

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Motorcycles

Avery and I went to look at motorcycles with D yesterday.  I realized it's pointless for me to participate in this purchase.  I know nothing about motorcycles.  My entire opinion on bikes comes from what color they are.  I like the apple green ones.

Anyway, the toy motorcycle purchase is moving forward.  D bought his helmet, jacket, and gloves yesterday.  I think he also still needs rain pants and something else.  Can't remember.  Then he's waiting for a new bike from Triumph to arrive in the dealership so he can test drive it.  I think he has it narrowed down to a decision between the Triumph and the BMW.

Induction

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SSP1

I know I can't get started sewing the knitting needle case until after I return from California, but I did manage to get the paper patterns cut, then used those to cut the cloth.  I bought a rotary cutter because, as Amber and Christie well know, I absolutely hated sitting there trying to cut out the fabric with scissors.  I found with a rotary cutter and a long metal yard stick, I was able to cut very fast, very accurately, and avoid pinning the pattern to the fabric.  So worth it.

Pattern cutouts

Fabric, interfacing, and batting

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Induction

Since I have several trips coming up (California, DC, Seattle, Vegas, Colorado), I decided to buy a portable induction cook top.  This means I'll easily be able to  cook the most important staple for keeping me eating right*: brown rice.  I also want to be able to start each day with my brown rice cereal.   So, I bought an induction cooktop and am planning to lug it with me to each location. I find if I "pre-eat" before going out to eat - particularly breakfast or brunch - I can still be a part of the meal socially, but maintain my diet for the most part.  And by diet I mean maintain a way of eating that gives me enough energy to not require naps every day.

I'm testing out a batch of brown rice on the burner as I type this.  For this first trip, I'm borrowing one of RHG's saucepans that will work with an induction burner.  Basically, if a magnet will stick to the bottom of a pan, then it will work on an induction cooktop.  I'll buy my own pan for such purposes, but I didn't get around to it before California, so a loaner will work.

I haven't tasted the batch of rice since it's still cooking, but it was shockingly fast to boil water.  Gas stoves are 30-35% efficient; induction is 80-85% efficient.  It is a little loud for me.  This is probably because I bought a stand-alone, portable unit in combination with the fact that I did not buy a top-of-the-line model. It's not super heavy, but not light, either.  We'll see how it works for putting it in my suitcase when I pack later today.

* I have just found that if I have my base of brown rice, then I can easily add vegetables and things to it to get at least a good start going to a meal. It helps me from going crazy and just eating whatever I can get my hands on. For me, it's the mere fact that I'm hungry, and therefore, shaky that generally contributes to poor eating.

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Hybrid Car Seat

And while I'm at detailing new purchases, I'll cover the new car seat I bought for Avery.  Well, I bought it more so I'd have a spare car seat in the car for driving Elise, Josie, or Henry.  The way I'm using it means it still meets Oregon state law for children under four.  It has a harness, but can become a simple booster seat.  I also bought it because it is easier to travel with than a regular car seat.

RHG did all the research into what type of booster I should buy (she loves researching this stuff, I hate it, so it's a rather perfect arrangement) and came up with this one.  I must admit I've been making fun of RHG quite often for her admitted obsession with car seats and car seat safety.  However, I'm pleased enough with this seat to give it a section on the blog.  It takes me less than a minute to install it (awesome!) and it's a really, really easy install.  It also comes with a travel bag which is doubly awesome.  And the final added bonus is that Avery loves the seat.  It's still too early to determine if it's the seat she loves, or if it's just that it's something new and novel to her.

Hybrid car seat/booster installed

Hybrid in its travel bag

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Kindle cover

We'll just make this whole dang post be a consumerism post.  I finally broke down and bought a cover for my Kindle.  I bought the one that has a built in light and has 4+ stars (out of 5) with over 5600 reviews.  The cool thing about it is the light is built into the cover and it charges off the Kindle itself.  So when you turn the Kindle off, the light goes off.  I chose apple green, which should come as no surprise to anyone.

I love apple green

Notice the light is not on because the Kindle is not turned on

Once the Kindle is on, if the light is pulled into position, it will light up the screen

Hooker

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One in search of hooks

I am one who is looking for hooks.  So that makes me a hooker, right?  Several months ago, I admitted to myself that my knife-rack-as-art-display area was a failure.  It would actually have worked perfectly had I installed the knife racks higher.  But at Avery level, she just promptly removes the art work to show off/carry around/do whatever, then leaves said art work laying about the house.  Eventually I gave up on it as an art display area and stuck some ill-fitting hooks on the knife rack and we started using it as a spot to hang her coats.  I like that spot for coat hanging, but the knife rack doesn't work as well as would, say, actual hooks.  So I'm in search of quirky/unique/cool hooks for that area.   In my search, I happened upon these three Fork You hooks that I want to put there so very much.  The good mother in me won't do it because sooner or later Avery will imitate it, but damn it, I love it!  Fork you.  Cracks me up.

I do like the idea of using repurposed silverware for hooks given this is in the kitchen. The guy does make peace sign hooks, but I realized the other day when I bought Avery underwear (because it was on clearance) that had peace signs on it that I have a strong aversion to the peace sign and peace symbol.  I'm all for peace mind you, but both the symbol and sign are so overused that it's like putting a brand on my wall.  I rarely wear anything that reveals itself to be a particular brand.

Anyway, I also love a lot of other things in this person's Etsy shop.  I want to buy these business card holders to use as name place holders, make name cards (embossed ones, of course) and then throw a dinner party.  Of course, I don't actually throw dinner parties, but I like these suckers enough to start doing that again.  Alternatively, I could use them to label brunch dishes at brunches!  Or I could assign seating at brunches.  Oh, the possibilities are endless.  But $60 seems a bit steep to spend on such a whim.  Still, can't you see the possibilities! Then when I start thinking about it, if it's only going to hold one card, versus a stack of cards, the holder should be less bulky.  He has fork ones for holding recipes, but I kind of like the spoons.  It's a moot point.  I'm not spending $60 on it.  (Oh, I say that now, but it's only a matter of time before I cave.  I give myself six months).

I also love these little vases.  They're so cute and quirky.  There are a bunch of different designs of them, so I'm not sure which I like best.  But they're so cool.

Hmmm, you can request custom work.  It would be very cool to have five fork hooks that spell Avery in sign language.  That's probably too expensive to justify, but I like the idea.

Anyone know someone who runs a lot of marathons? This would be a great gift to display their medals on.  He has ones that say Marathon and other distances, too.  I like the numbers since you kind of have to think about it.

Oh, I think I found my favorite quirky one so far.  The hanger coat rack.  This might be the one.  I just wish it had five hooks. I shall sleep on it.

So, I am not a big holiday person and I don't like wind chimes (too much noise), but I still want this.  How cool is that for a decoration?

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Sewing

I finished my apron last Sunday night.  Christie took a picture of me in it, but I didn't take a picture of it finished.  It's an apron and it's done.  Truth be told, I just wanted to learn and didn't care much about the actual apron.  

My next project is going to be a knitting needle case for Rachele.  Egads.  I'm going to follow the instructions on a blog post she found that goes through the steps to make a case. 

The next step is for Rachele to pick the fabric from a list I sent over (assuming she finds at least one of them to be acceptable), then I shall go shopping for additional supplies.  One of those will be a rotary cutter because I quickly discovered my hatred for cutting fabric with scissors. 

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IKEA

I went to IKEA after lunch on Saturday.  Avery was so good for the whole trip.  I let her pick out a toy for her, one for Elise, and one for Nolan.  She picked out the same stuffed rat for everyone, but she got herself a white one, Elise a gray one, and Nolan a black one.  Both Avery and Elise went to sleep with their new rats tonight.  Nolan couldn't have cared less about it.

I bought a cabinet to be installed over the toilet in our master bathroom.  The toilet is in it's own little room and has an insanely high ceiling.  I think it only seems insanely high because it's such a tiny space.  Anyway, we have no upper cabinets to use as a medicine cabinet in our bathroom.  I want to keep medicines, etc out of reach of Avery, so I had put them in our hall linen closet.  I'm ready to reclaim that closet for linens, so this seemed a good solution.  I didn't want to spend a lot on a cabinet, so IKEA seemed a good solution.  We'll see if I feel that way when it is installed.

I went with a kitchen cabinet rather than the bathroom cabinet.  The bathroom one is more narrow to avoid bumping your head against, however, there were very few choices with that cabinet.  Also, we have the aforementioned insanely high ceilings, so it can be installed high enough to avoid head injuries, though I must say I think a head injury sustained when pooping would be highly amusing.

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Sleep Over

E & N are spending the night tonight following our new spend-the-night option with date nights.  To be clear, the spend-the-night option will be used sparingly, but it does afford the couple enjoying the date night to not have to retrieve kid(s) after the evening and be able to sleep in a bit in the morning.

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New Ailment

And a new ailment to add to the growing list.  Just now I tried to say, "Are you freakin' kidding me?" (stupid website problem) but what happened was my throat contracted painfully and forced me to cough to clear it.  Body, why must you hate healthy food so?  Give in to it.  Embrace it.  Megan likes her energy.

Lingers

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Health

I'm so bored of this topic. I know everyone else is too. But, when I need to know what happened when, I come here, so document I shall. Just skip to the next topic if you're as bored as I am.  My sickness lingers on.  Last night, I slept with two heating pads (the kinds you heat in the microwave, not the kind you plug in) and TWO down comforters on me because I was convinced the warmth would limit my body aches.  I was right.  I did get a decent night of sleep, though I did sweat a lot in the night.  Oddly, despite sweating, I know it wasn't night sweats and I also did nothing to push off the second down comforter.  I also slept in the same position all night.  All very weird.

I thought I'd gotten lucky and avoid the usual side effects I suffer when getting on or off SSRIs.  Tapering up on the Prozac hadn't shown any of my usual signs.  I was wrong.  It just takes longer for Prozac to build up in your system, so I didn't start to feel any of the side effects until yesterday.  I have the usual tingling lips and a kind of electric shock feeling when I turn too fast, or when something startles me.  I always get these particular side effects in the beginning. They will subside.  Despite being relatively mild, I find them both physically and mentally painful, so I'm hoping they subside quickly.  That I increased my dose today probably means at least another few weeks of side effects at this dosage.  With my increase, I'm still only at 20mg.  I think the typical dose for depression is 80mg, so I have a ways to go.

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Energy

On the upside, I'm definitely seeing signs that the diet is truly helping my waking hours.  I told D that this is really the first time in my life when I understand what people mean when they say they wake up refreshed.  I've certainly had mornings in the past where I leap out of bed, but those were usually one-offs and/or very exciting days (wedding day, the day we went to pick up Avery at the hospital, etc) For the past couple of weeks, I'm tired when I wake up, but I get out of bed and about 10 minutes later, I'm awake.  Like truly awake.  I very rarely think, "Now, when can I get a nap in today?"  This part is truly like night and day.  That I think about my day in the shower in terms of what I can get done vs when I can arrange for a nap is a massive difference.

In a way, I'm also glad that the napping hasn't changed.  I want that to go away, clearly, but that it hasn't lends some credence to the fact that this isn't all in my head. My body needs this sleep for some reason.  What that reason is, I don't know.  But it makes me feel so much better about myself.  Maybe I'm not the laziest person of all time.  Because now during my awake hours, I have energy and I am cleaning and doing things with Avery and generally getting stuff done when I'm not asleep.  That was such.a.struggle before.  A massive, constant struggle to just make it from one nap to another to bed.  Now, while I hit a wall and need a nap, I at least seem to hit the wall running.  That part is unpleasant, but I'll take that over crawling through mud to the wall so I can get some sleep.

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Reintroduction

In theory I'm supposed to reintroduce on Monday.  I think I've decided I'm not going to do it unless I'm well.  I have made it this long.  And while it's been relatively easy, as I've stated, the perfection of the elimination part of the diet is something I don't want to go through again.  I want my evidence that it is or is not a sensitivity. I want that evidence as untainted as possible.  Then I don't want to do the perfection of the elimination diet again.  I want to stay eating closely to how I've been eating a vast majority of the time, but I don't want to think twice about whether there might be a smidge of butter in something or whether I just licked the yogurt off my finger when serving it to Avery.  And I just discovered there is soy is sugar-free gum.  I had a couple of sticks of sugar-free gum a week or two ago.  Perfection is freakin' hard, people!

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Bikes

D is out looking at bikes (motorcycles) with Avery.  I am expecting him to call so we can all go out of sushi, which is about the only dining-out option I have at the moment.  Thank goodness everyone in our family loves sushi.  D is leaning towards the Triumph for anyone who cares (Collin, Dad :)).  The Ducatti is more expensive, so I think that is the determining factor. 

He's all signed up for his three day motorcycle safety class in March, so I would expect a new member will join our family around that time.  It hit me the other day that I'll have to find space in our garage for this member.  We have plenty of room, but the garage is my domain and mine alone.  This is the opposite of most male/female spouses, I think. Despite our very traditional arrangement of me being the primary caregiver, primary cook, and primary cleaner and D being the breadwinner, we still have role reversal in a number of areas. 

Refugees

Adopt a family

I've been immersed in my own little materialistic world of gift buying for Avery and people I know.  It's high time I shift gears a bit and do something for those less fortunate. I also want Avery to know it's important to recognize and help others who aren't as fortunate as we are.  At first, I thought I'd find a toy drive and buy a toy for a needy kid or two, but as I was searching online for locations to do this, I found an opportunity to adopt a needy refugee family for Christmas.  Since I've read a couple of books about the lives of refugees seeking asylum in America* (Do They Hear You When You Cry? and Behind the Burqa: Our Life in Afghanistan and How We Escaped to Freedom), I feel a connection to helping out these families.  So, we're adopting a refugee family for Christmas.  It's through Lutheran Community Services NW.

I've been informed we'll be "splitting" a family with another sponsor because this family has eight people in it.  I'll soon receive details about the four people for whom we'll be buying gifts. 

I can say for sure that I won't be buying anyone this $89 decorative rope from Restoration Hardware.  Seriously?  It'd make a good (crappy) white elephant gift if it wasn't $90!

* FYI, America does not treat refugees seeking asylum very well.  We basically stick them in prison until it's proven they are truly in danger in the country they are fleeing, or we deport them.

Expectations

Juxtapose these two articles:

• American exceptionalism: an old idea and a new political battle
• US falls to average in education ranking
  

Do the people, mostly the GOP, who believe so feverishly in American exceptionalism realize that just saying it doesn't make it so?  You actually have to do the work.  You actually have to fund education.  I came across one of D's report cards from his elementary school years.  I was stunned at the bluntness of the assessments made.  It told the truth: you need to improve here and here, you're not doing well here, do better.  I could not recall a single teacher being anywhere near that blunt with me on any subject.  Does this sort of coddling contribute to the fact that American teens rank 1st in the world in self-esteem, but 23rd in math? Is it a part of why US teens lag as China soars on international test?

Which leads to my issue with Little Gym.  Consider this rant an attempt to let go of my issue with Little Gym so Christie & Amber don't have to hear my complain about it every time they see me. The general format of Little Gym is as follows:
1. Sit in a circle and do introductions
2. Run around on the mat and do various exercises
3. Spread out in the gym for a bit of "free" time for maybe 5 minutes
4. Watch the instructor demonstrate a skill
5. Kids attempt the skill
6. Repeat steps 4 and 5
7. Gather on the mat to play a few more games with balls or bubbles
8. Sing a song goodbye & listen to announcements

Now, I have issues with their method of starting the music, then stopping it to talk, then starting it, then stopping it, then starting it ...  And I have issues with how the class in conducted from an efficiency standpoint since the kids rarely get to practice a skill more than once.  However, it's not these things that so enrage me.  Let me outline what really gets my goat. 

Issue 1 - low expectations
At the beginning the teacher always says how she wants parents and kids to be on the mat and participating in the songs, but then she says, "But it's OK if they run around and play.  Just keep a watchful on the kids.  But parents stay here and model good behavior."  Yeah, if you don't tell the kids you expect them to participate in the class, you're going to have at least ½ that don't participate at any given time.

Another example of low expectations: the teachers consistently assume a child is not capable of a skill. For example, Avery and Henry can both do very skilled somersaults on their own.  They roll in a straight direction, they tuck their heads, they roll.  Every damn time the teacher says let's do forward rolls, she "helps" both kids do the roll.  Let them do it on their own!  You could argue the teacher is just being safe and spotting the kids.  However, I see it as not giving kids the room to work on the skill themselves.  Yes, spotting is needed on more difficult skills, but a forward roll?  And the teachers do this with everything it seems.  Henry could probably manage to jump off the highest bar in the room and he'd be fine, but that teacher always grabs his hand to help him jump two feet. Why are the mats there if not to help cushion falls?

Issue 2 - teaching rudeness
One of my biggest pet peeves when I was in HS was kids who would talk while the teacher, or even worse a guest speaker, was talking.  It still drives me crazy when people do this.  I find it so very rude when people talk while a speaker or teacher is speaking.  This class format basically teaches kids that it's OK to be rude when someone - and a teacher no less - is speaking.

Issue 3 - rewarding those who don't follow the rules
Often, because the format of the class is so stupid and there is so much chaos, the teacher is rushing to get a skill demonstrated so at least a few children will get to try the skill. When she/he demonstrates, kids are often instructed to watch from a safe distance. What I've noticed is that the kids who don't do as instructed tend to be the ones selected to demonstrate a skill.  I don't care that Avery, who in these situations tends to be a rule follower*, specifically doesn't get to demonstrate, but I do care that what she's witnessing is the rule-breaker being rewarded.

I don't remember having such issues with Little Gym the first time around.  Thinking about it, part of it is probably that I think expectations should increase as children get older.  When she was in the class before, it made sense that the kids would be mostly exploring and/or not expected to sit in a circle.  However, that needs to change as kids get older. 

And, yes, this is the same place where we're doing Avery's BD party.  For a BD party, the point is to have fun and have a party, so this loosey goosey way of doing things is fine in that situation.

* Need I qualify this statement? No, well, I'm doing it anyway: At the moment, Avery tends to be a rule follower in these situations ...

Falling apart

It seems our appliances are hitting the age where problems are popping up more often.  The latest appliance to act up is the washing machine.  It now beeps for no reason and sometimes refuses to work.  I did some research online and the problem seems to be a broken electrical control board.  Unfortunately, I discovered while I was doing research that our washing machine, that we paid top dollar for five years ago, is basically a piece o' crap.  We have had a few minor problems, but it's washed clothes well and I've been quite happy with it.  However, there are terrible ratings for our model all over the place.  And problems seem to start happening about now.  So I don't know if we should spend the $200 (my estimate for fixing our machine) to get this one fixed, or if we should get a new one.  I hate to spend money on a new washing machine because, well, how fun is that?  Not fun.  It also seems so very excessive to get a new one with the first issue.  But, if it's only going to experience more problems, maybe it's better to bite the bullet now.  I don't know.  Thoughts, anyone?