17 hours

That is how long I made it before breaking my "no caffeine" plan. After the facial person told me caffeine is bad for your skin - along with BT saying her mom said that it had a bad effect on her skin, too - I decided to give up caffeine for 8 weeks. Skin runs in 6 week cycles (according to my Denver dermatologist) so it would take 6 weeks to run the experiment and then 2 weeks for added benefit of seeing results. However, I made it only 17 hours before the headache got to me and I had my cup of tea. I was only going to take a few sips because I've read that is all it takes to make the withdrawal headache go away, but I drank the whole darn thing because it was so yummy.

Rain is still coming down and it looks dreadful outside. Here, I'll turn my iMac towards the window and take a picture with it:

That picture doesn't really capture the dreariness of the day. The poor dogs really want a walk. I've decided to run the to store for ingredients for dinner for tonight and if it's still raining like this when we get back, well then, we'll just have to walk in the rain. The dogs demand it.

Finally, D called me this morning and told me to listen to the This I Believe segment on NPR. I read the essay instead of playing it ... click here to read it. I definitely relate very strongly to what she is saying and it made me feel better to know I'm not the only person who doesn't want the stellar career title. I know I have the intellectual ability and the educational background to do more career-wise. I think with some effort and discipline, I would have gone quite far in consulting or in industry, but I was never quite happy when I was working in that capacity. I think I'm much better interacting with the world when I'm not in that situation. I was always angry at something (which is not to say I have solved that problem, but I'm working on it) or someone; I couldn't just let things go; and, if I'm honest with myself, I think I was a horror to work with a lot of the time. I was good at what I did, but I wasn't exactly fun to be around. Plus, I had no ability to have perspective on things when I was in the thick of it or to properly direct my frustrations. Clearly, this is only a stance one has the liberty/luxury to take when there are not serious financial issues to deal with and I recognize that. Maybe I should allow myself to be content with CEO of CdT for while without feeling guilty about it all the time. Or maybe that guilt is good for me. I don't know. CdT will need dinner tonight. Off I go.